jueves, 3 de agosto de 2017

The candy store

The candy store 

Once upon a time there was a girl name Amelia, she love so much candies. One day she went to Alison candy bar her mother's store,it was very very big like all new jersey city,she loved that place, when she enter she saw lots of candy flavors there were many but to many sweets,and all taste super delicious, the delicious candies in the entire world,she take a shooping car and start putting not many tons of candies in the car, she took all the candy store and she take all the candies to her house. His mom Alison realized and she start ranning to her house but she run so so fast that their shoes were on fire. Finally she arrive to the house but it was so late,the house was full of all the candies but it was so full that the house explote.Alison scold Amelia and she prohibited the enter to her store, Amelia learn the lesson that she cannot take all those candies withaut permition  
  
The End ...
















5 comentarios:

  1. you can correct grammar, but i like it because i like exagerations

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  2. when i saw the candys i got hungry

    you gotta correct some grammar mistakes but good storie

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  3. I liked a lot your your story but you need to check spelling mistake.

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  4. Laura you are missing the personal information,also the culture, remember not to confuse the he and the she also puntuation marks

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